Exploring China (Pt. 1)

My friend, The Divo, has made it to China and e-mailed me some nice photos of his trip thus far. Seems the first stop is in Shanghai, which is on the northeast coast of China next to the East China Sea. To learn more about Shanghai, you can click here:

(Above): The Oriental Pearl Tower amidst the Pudong district skyline.

(Above): Nanjing Road, a popular shopping district in Shanghai, has many neon lights and advertisements like Times Square, NYC.

(Above): The Shanghai Museum.

(Above): I'm not quite sure where this is (I'll have to ask him when I e-mail him back); kinda looks like a courtyard in a temple or a museum.

(Above): A countdown to Expo 2010

(Above): Another shot of Nanjing Road at night.

Commencement Day

Today is commencement day and no, I'm not graduating but I will be in about two years. However, this day compels me to reflect on the long journey that has made up my secondary education. This year, the dream of graduating from college is closer to reality than it has ever been. College has always been an important part of my family but not necessarily an easy road. My mom is an alum of UMass Boston as is my aunt, who also works there. My dad went to school in Mississippi and another aunt recently completed her bachelors and she is over the age of 60! There are ministers, doctors, principals and accountants in my family, so you can see part of why this means so much. Furthermore, my maternal grandfather (we'll dub him Triple H) was a staunch believer in Black history and civil rights and always believed education was the key to success.

I started college about 9 years ago, fresh out of high school with not a clue of what was truly involved. I knew I liked planes so I blindly picked out a school in FL, ERAU, the top aviation school in the country. Yeah, and top dollars too. "No worries," I though and after a year, transferred to DWC. Great place, did a lot of soul-searching, rediscovered my musical talent and ended up at Berklee. Another top dollar school. Subsequently, I gave up for a few years and just worked full-time. I was in a funk for several years, not knowing what direction I was headed and thinking that maybe it wasn't meant for me to graduate or get a degree.

Now I'm back in school, paying for it myself and working my butt off. The credits from my previous schools paid off and I've achieved the 75 credits out of 120 needed to graduate. All my gen. ed. requirements are finished and I'm just focusing on my recently declared major of music. The best part of all this is my 3.7 GPA! (believe me when I say that my GPA at past schools was NEVER this high!)

Overall, I wish I had attended UMass Boston many years back but I still don't think I would have grasped what it meant to be in college. Being African-American, I know about the struggles my people have endured to obtain education and how blessed I am to even have this privilege; I never let that thought stray far from my mind. I'm older and wiser now, and just more settled. I know what I want and I'm not letting anything (short of money) get in my way. I had to experience the hardships of the "real world" firsthand and came to realize I need this degree. I've never really been a quitter and even though it's taken 9 years to get to this point, it's worth it. I used to want to impress people with where I attended school but now I know it's not about the opinions of family or friends, it's about me. I'm doing this to prove to myself, to get past this challenge and if I keep up this pace, I'll finally be able to walk across that stage like those before me and say I did it.

The Glass Is Half Empty

I thought my first post would be more positive but I'm finding it hard these days to think positive. I have always felt that anytime my life is going good, "things fall apart" (Chinua Achebe). I got the news the other day that my grades for the spring semester were all A's and of course that only brought my GPA up even more! Believe me, after years of C's and D's at my other colleges, it feels nice to do well.

But of course I seem to be focusing on the negative things lately. About a month ago, I got an e-mail from a former best friend (D.G.) and subsequently, we're no longer friends. I've also been feeling abandoned and betrayed by most of the people I considered friends (I don't like to use that word loosely) and honestly it's hurting more than I anticipated. I am a loner most of the time. I'm very quiet at work and in school, and prefer hanging out at home instead of being around crowds. That's not to say I don't enjoy company and friendship but I prefer my own thoughts sometimes to other people. For the past year or two, I've really come a long way and actually started branching out and socializing more but now I fear that these latest happenings will leave me distrustful. I really value the friendships I make with people and especially with the only two best friends (D.G. & Crazy) whom I considered family. It does hurt, not being able to understand what went wrong and not being able to talk to her anymore. We probably outgrew each other but that doesn't make this "grieving" process any easier. I wish I had a switch to shut off my emotions but I need to endure these feelings so that I can become a better person. As my good friend The Divo* would say, "this too shall pass."

*On a side note: The Divo is headed to China for a few weeks and while I'm insanely envious, I wish him the best and hope he has a safe and fun trip!

Things Fall Apart

I thought my first post would be more positive but I'm finding it hard these days to think positive. I have always felt that anytime my life is going good, "things fall apart" (Chinua Achebe). I got the news the other day that my grades for the spring semester were all A's and of course that only brought my GPA up even more! Believe me, after years of C's and D's at my other colleges, it feels nice to do well.

But of course I seem to be focusing on the negative things lately. About a month ago, I got an e-mail from a former best friend (D.G.) and subsequently, we're no longer friends. I've also been feeling abandoned and betrayed by most of the people I considered friends (I don't like to use that word loosely) and honestly it's hurting more than I anticipated. I am a loner most of the time. I'm very quiet at work and in school, and prefer hanging out at home instead of being around crowds. That's not to say I don't enjoy company and friendship but I prefer my own thoughts sometimes to other people. For the past year or two, I've really come a long way and actually started branching out and socializing more but now I fear that these latest happenings will leave me distrustful. I really value the friendships I make with people and especially with the only two best friends (D.G. & Crazy) whom I considered family. It does hurt, not being able to understand what went wrong and not being able to talk to her anymore. We probably outgrew each other but that doesn't make this "grieving" process any easier. I wish I had a switch to shut off my emotions but I need to endure these feelings so that I can become a better person. As my good friend The Divo* would say, "this too shall pass."

*On a side note: The Divo is headed to China for a few weeks and while I'm insanely envious, I wish him the best and hope he has a safe and fun trip!

Welcome!

Welcome to my blog! Whew, let me tell you, I almost didn't make it here myself but here I am.

The title of my blog comes from one of my favorite musicians, Miss Jill Scott and I think it aptly describes where I am currently at in life. I am discovering that there are many facets to life and I'm so amazed at how mature I can be ... and immature at times. I want to discover what it truly means to be human and not just the good but the bad as well. The flaws, mistakes, and slip-ups are just as much a part of us as our talents and dreams.

Let me be honest, I don't know what direction I will take this blog. I have been reading other blogs for over a year now and since I am a quiet person, I don't comment. But I have a lot to say inside. I listen, I watch. And now I feel inspired to speak out. I hope you'll help me out with feedback and while you'll be helping me be a better person, I hope I can do the same for you. Together, we'll find out what it means to be beautifully human.